2 min read
You’ve just received a reunion “save the date” and feel an immediate rush of excitement about catching up with family you haven’t seen in ages.
Soon however, that familiar pang of worry arises. How should you mention this event to your care recipient? Will they share your enthusiasm or shut down at the mere idea of travel?
Many caregivers struggle with how to discuss travel plans. Don't worry, with a little preparation and a lot of heart, these conversations can open doors to new adventures and cherished memories.
Why It's Tricky (But Worth It)
Before we dive into the "how," let's discuss the "why." Travel discussions might be loaded with emotion:
- Your care recipient may worry about health issues or disrupting their routine.
- You might feel guilty about wanting a change of scenery.
- There could be concerns related to costs or logistics.
Keep in mind, addressing these worries together can strengthen your bond and lead to experiences you'll both treasure.
Starting the Conversation
Choose a relaxed moment — maybe over a cup of tea after a quiet meal — and keep it casual. "You know, today I was thinking about that beach we used to visit. Remember how much you loved collecting shells?"
A conversational approach accomplishes two goals: it rekindles happy memories and gently introduces the idea of travel.
Listen More Than You Talk
When your care recipient responds, be mindful to listen attentively. Are they wistful? Anxious? Their tone will guide your next steps.
If they seem interested, wonderful! If not, don't push an uncomfortable topic. Consider reframing the conversation by saying: "I just love remembering those trips. Maybe we could look at old photos together sometime?"
Addressing Worries with Care
If concerns are expressed, validate them with comments such as: "I understand you're worried about being away from your doctor. That's a really important point."
Use the opportunity to brainstorm solutions together, perhaps suggest: "What if we talked to Dr. Smith about our trip? She might have great advice for traveling safely."
Making It a Team Effort
Involve your care recipient in travel planning. Their participation could simply be an answer to: "If we were to take a trip, what would be most important to you? Quiet evenings? Seeing family? Good food?"
While the travel destination is important, equally so is feeling heard and valued.
When the Answer is "No"
Sometimes, despite our compassionate efforts, a care recipient’s answer to travel will still be "no," and that's okay. Respect their decision and remember, there are many ways to "travel.” Here are some ideas:
- Suggest a themed movie night with foods from different cultures.
- Take virtual museum tours together.
- Plan short day trips to nearby attractions.
Satisfy the travel itch while keeping everyone comfortable.
Taking Care of You
It's natural to be disappointed if travel plans don't come to fruition. Give yourself permission to feel that emotion. Consider reaching out to a friend or joining a caregiver support group when you are discouraged or overwhelmed. Taking care of yourself is vital to being an exceptional caregiver.
Tips for Getting Started
Ready to initiate the travel conversation?
- Note 2-3 happy travel memories to mention in casual conversation.
- List any concerns you suspect will arise and identify gentle solutions.
- Contemplate a low-stakes route to introduce the topic; no pressure, just plant a seed.
Remember, this is the first step on a journey. Take it slow, be patient with yourself and your care recipient, and keep the lines of communication open.
Looking for more practical tips on how to approach challenging caregiving conversations? We invite you to learn more about Caregiven and consider signing up for the app.